YOU CANNOT SAVE EVERYONE WHILE NEGLECTING YOURSELF!
There’s a sickness in our community that’s been passed down like an old hand-me-down jacket—too tight, worn out, and no longer serving us. It’s this deep-rooted need to save everybody. We see someone heading toward a cliff, and we break our backs running to grab them, yelling, “Don’t do it!” But they’ve already jumped in their heart. And sometimes, trying to save them only pulls us off the edge right behind them.
Let me make it plain: you can’t save everybody. And more importantly, you weren’t meant to.
They Didn’t Want Your Help to Begin With
How many times have you tried to give a brother or sister some solid advice, only to be met with pride, eye-rolls, or silence? You warn them about the man with five baby mamas and no job. You warn them about that friend always in some mess, pulling them into drama. You point out the red flags, the reckless spending, the lack of discipline—and they shrug it off like you’re speaking Swahili.
Fast-forward a few months: the same people are calling your phone at midnight, crying about the consequences you saw coming like a train on tracks. Now you’re expected to drop everything, clean up the mess, and make it right. But ask yourself—who was there for you when you needed saving?
The Savior Complex Will Drain You
We’ve got to understand that always jumping in to rescue folks who ignore good counsel will drain your spirit. You can’t fill someone’s cup if yours is empty. You’re not the emergency room for every broken heart, bad decision, or chaotic lifestyle. Some people need to go through that fire. Some lessons can’t be taught—they have to be lived.
Trying to fix everybody's life will leave your life neglected. Your bills unpaid. Your dreams postponed. Your peace shattered. Meanwhile, the very people you’re sacrificing for would never do the same for you.
Let the Consequences Teach Them
We’ve got to learn to let people sit in the consequences of their actions. That doesn’t mean you don’t love them—it means you respect them enough to let them grow. Pain is a teacher that never fails. Some of the most powerful lessons come from hitting rock bottom, not being pulled out just before impact.
When we interfere too much, we rob people of their growth. We shield them from accountability. And that, my brothers and sisters, is not love—that’s ego. You’re not God. You’re not the Messiah. Let folks walk their path, even if it’s crooked.
Save Yourself First
We’ve got to start saving ourselves—mentally, spiritually, emotionally. Build your foundation. Focus on your family, your purpose, your peace. Be an example, not a crutch. Lead by how you live, not by how many people you carry on your back.
Because the truth is, some people want your energy but not your wisdom. They want your time, your money, your help—but not your truth. And if you keep giving, they’ll keep taking… until you have nothing left.
To my people: I say this with love and fire—stop trying to be everybody’s savior. Speak truth, offer wisdom, lead by example, and when they reject it, step back. Let life do what it do.
Your peace is not a sacrifice. Your purpose is not a side job. Save your energy for those who are ready, willing, and humble enough to listen. The rest? Let them find their own way.
Because in the end, the greatest act of love is sometimes letting go.
LanceScurv