YOUR MANHOOD ISN'T MEASURED BY HOW MANY WOMEN YOU BED DOWN...

I was born and raised at a time when disease wouldn’t kill you. A time when your urges didn’t have a 24-hour portal to manipulate your mind. There was no social media back then, no constant stream of sexual imagery to keep you in a state of arousal. Life had structure, responsibility, and purpose. You had chores, goals, a trade to learn, and a path to build. But what I see now deeply concerns me—and I say this as someone who’s lived a full life and avoided many of the traps that destroy good men.

Social media today? To me, it's soft porn. Plain and simple. It's designed to keep you titillated, distracted, and constantly craving stimulation. And what’s even more alarming is how young men are being lured into that mental state where lust rules everything. Meanwhile, many women, especially young ones, have figured out how to profit from it—all from the comfort of their bedrooms, never leaving the house, never building a real-life skill.

We’re watching society degrade right in front of our eyes. Relationships are no longer about love, commitment, or building something with another person. Now it’s about quick gratification, sexual conquest, and shallow validation. And while not all young people fall into this, far too many are being swallowed whole by this hedonistic culture. They wake up one day at 18 and turn around to find they’re 40—with nothing but a trail of broken relationships, unplanned children, financial mess, and emotional scars.

This is why I have to speak plainly to you now. From one who’s been there and made it through without getting lost.

Let me make this clear: your sexuality is not entertainment. It is not a game. It is not sport. It is power. And if you use it the wrong way, it will absolutely destroy you.

Never cross the lines of authority. If a woman is under your leadership—as a student, employee, or subordinate—leave it alone. Trust me, even if it feels like you’re in control, once that relationship goes south, you lose that power. She might start off calling you “sir,” but in the wrong scenario, you’ll be called something else. And your reputation, peace of mind, or even your freedom can vanish overnight.

Look at what happened with Shannon Sharpe and so many countless others…

We live in an era where one wrong move can ruin your name forever. And social media never forgets. If you’re creeping on the side, don’t let your emotions write checks your soul can’t cash. Keep your communication factual. No romance, no promises. Protect yourself. In this age, proof matters.

If you’re not prepared to follow through, don’t whisper sweet nothings. A man should never trade lies for access. If you don’t see her in your future, don’t play with her present. Real men walk in integrity, not in manipulation.

Now let’s talk about the kind of women you entertain. If she has no drive, no direction, no goals, you might be her only plan. And if you become her way out of a dead-end life, prepare for a relationship built on dependency, not love. Some women weaponize pregnancy—not out of love, but survival. And if she views you as her last lifeline, leaving her may come at a cost.

Ask yourself: if she’s living recklessly now, how will she raise your child? Can she nurture, guide, and protect your legacy? Or will your child become another casualty of confusion?

And if you have to reach for protection every time, stop and think—why are you even there? If you don’t trust her with your health, your peace, or your name, then why are you giving her access to your body?

That’s why I say this again: sex is spiritual warfare. It connects you to someone’s energy, trauma, history, and intentions. And not everyone deserves to leave a mark on your spirit.

Back in my day, this wasn’t a big deal because we had structure. You had something to do. Now, far too many are idle, and idle hands and minds drift into dangerous places. Hedonism has taken the wheel, and too many are crashing before they even figure out who they are.

Even loyalty between brothers is under attack. Just because your friend says he’s cool with you dating his ex doesn’t mean it’s righteous. Real loyalty respects emotional scars. It’s not about what you can do—it’s about what you shouldn’t do. Some wounds don’t heal because they’re constantly reopened by betrayal.

Men, understand this: you’re not desperate. You’re not starving. You’re not a slave to your blood engorged loins. Every time you lie down with a woman, you're making a spiritual transaction—and possibly a lifelong commitment. Be selective. Be intentional. Because once a child comes into the picture, that bond lasts forever.

Lastly, stop trying to be the guy with the highest body count. That is not manhood. That’s immaturity dressed up in testosterone. All you're doing is spreading yourself thin and draining your spiritual energy. There’s nothing impressive about being broken on the inside but popular in someone else’s bedroom.

Your manhood is not defined by how many women want you—but by how many temptations you walk away from. Master your urges, and you will master your destiny.

I share this not as a preacher, not as a perfect man, but as someone who’s lived, observed, and learned. I thank God I didn’t fall into certain traps—not because I’m better than anyone, but because I was lucky and I listened. Now I hope you’ll do the same.

Take your time. Guard your energy. And know that in a world trying to destroy you through pleasure, the man who builds discipline becomes a king.

Let me hear from you in the comments below.

Sincerely,

LanceScurv